Nadia — Hi Nadia. The way I see it, if there is any unease associated with the want, then there is attachment and suffering. For many people, eating chocolate whenever they feel like it will create suffering too. A pattern of ‘small’ indulgences, if unmanaged, can be a significant problem in someone’s life.

Brenda — Haha, good question. I won’t be in New Zealand until the end of October.

Prayerthegate — Someone told me about a good way to avoid eating dessert when you’re already full: just wait 15 minutes, then eat it if you still want. Often the want is gone by then. It’s almost like the mandatory waiting period for buying a gun :)

Lori — Exactly, the benefit of indulging is as usually as far as our thinking goes. The more objectively we can see the cost, the easier it is to turn something down.
.-= David Cain´s last blog ..The Essential Skill of “Want Management” =-.

I usually to a quick “exercise equivalence calculation.” Like, “Do I really want to bike an extra hour to eat a bland bagel this morning?”
Game over. (ha)

Once again, a well-said post for a very complicated topic. Thanks, David.

Cool post. :) I think the issue with “wants” is that people define themselves according to what they want. There is a distinction between craving and wanting. To crave chocolate for example is not a source of suffering from a Buddhist perspective. Most Buddhist masters would tell you, eat the chocolate and end the suffering. Craving coffee or chocolate in the scheme of spirituality are not huge deals.

Thinking that someone is superior because they buy coffee from Starbucks is a want (the desire to better). Causes of suffering such as wants are bigger issues. Such as the want to be happy…well, guess what? You already are but all the things we call our issues gets in the way. We already have what we need but we cover it up with attachments which we call experience, than we have suffering.
.-= Nadia – Happy Lotus´s last blog ..The Spirit of the Free =-.

I stopped myself just by realizing that I wanted to buy it, but I didn’t want to own it.

So many temptations are like that. We want that moment of gratification, but not any of the undesirables that come with it.

Lisis — I don’t recommend depriving yourself at all. Just calmly declining most of the time. There doesn’t need to be a feeling of deprivation if it is a truly conscious choice rather than a reactive one. But I think that makes the occasional indulgence every bit as healthy (and guilt free.) I’m learning not to trust the word “deserve” whenever I hear myself saying it. It always seems like I’m using it to try to get away with something.

Kim — Well you gotta eat something. I try not to ignore hunger pangs, because it’s my body that wants food, not my mind. Temptation is a mental phenomenon.

Suzen — Yeah that quick pause works wonders. Just thinking “Okay, there is a want in the building, be aware” instantly gives you a dose of perspective to better decide how you’ll manage it.